Showing posts with label mess. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mess. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Call me slacker mom

I have never claimed to be super mom. My kids don't eat an organic diet, they watch TV and play video games, they have dirty faces and I wouldn't change it for anything in the world.


It never occurred to me that I would be judged on my toddlers table manners. That having spaghetti in your eyebrows at two was socially unacceptable.

The mommy wars have went too far and they are sucking the fun out of childhood. Kids should be allowed to be loud and messy in appropriate places. A kid covered in dirt at a park is not a big deal. A kid squealing with happiness going down a water slide is perfectly acceptable.

I am tired of seeing mothers try and stop their kids from being kids because someone else may judge them.

Judge away I say. Let your inner asshattery show.

Tell me to my face I am a bad mother for having a mud covered toddler and dog, go on, I dare ya.

Being a kid is about pretending you are a dog without people judging you 


it is about eating cake like cookie monster and admitting forks are the enemy

It is about feeling the pumpkin guts squish between your fingers.
Why do you care if you got every last speck of dirt off their hand before running to the corner store? Before a wedding yes, before getting butter ... not so much. Why do you care if they make barking noises at pedestrians you pass. Sure it is inappropriate for a fancy restaurant but just out for a walk? What are you afraid of? That someone is going to give you a dirty look? silently judge you? Talk about you later?

Screw em. You only get one chance at a childhood, make sure it rocks for your kids. If something happened and you lost your kid tomorrow you wouldn't say things like
"I wish his face had been cleaner"
"I wish my dishes had always been done"
no it woudl be "I wish I played with them more" or "I wish I hadn't told them no quite so much"

I may loose the mommy wars and I am ok with that as long as I give my kids an awesome childhood. 


Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Galactus stikes again

I AM BABY GALACTUS DESTROYER OF ROOMS



I don't know why I even bother trying to clean. Other women can have a toddler and a clean house but I am apparently incapable. Whenever we go visit a friend of mine who has kids and a spotless house I always secretly suspect they drug them to get housework done.

See that picture. That happened while I was doing housework. I was hanging clothes on the back deck. I should have known better and tied Galactus to the dog run to keep him out of trouble while I did so but instead I left him unsupervised for 2 whole minutes. He emptied his diaper bag which I can deal with. He also got into my pantry and dumped 2 kilos of icing sugar on my floor.

Oh yeah never a dull moment. And then while I was st- st- st- st- stuttering like Porky Pig he decided he could make it all better



Um yeah ... grinding it into the floor while spreading it around isn't helping much. Maybe you could just run before I regain my senses and duct tape you to a chair for three mins peace