Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Galactus stikes again


I don't know why I even bother trying to clean. Other women can have a toddler and a clean house but I am apparently incapable. Whenever we go visit a friend of mine who has kids and a spotless house I always secretly suspect they drug them to get housework done.

See that picture. That happened while I was doing housework. I was hanging clothes on the back deck. I should have known better and tied Galactus to the dog run to keep him out of trouble while I did so but instead I left him unsupervised for 2 whole minutes. He emptied his diaper bag which I can deal with. He also got into my pantry and dumped 2 kilos of icing sugar on my floor.

Oh yeah never a dull moment. And then while I was st- st- st- st- stuttering like Porky Pig he decided he could make it all better

Um yeah ... grinding it into the floor while spreading it around isn't helping much. Maybe you could just run before I regain my senses and duct tape you to a chair for three mins peace

Monday, April 16, 2012

Stranger Danger ... are you kidding me?

Despite knowing better the image of a strange man offering our kids candy in an effort to lure them away is still the dominant image in our minds when we think of childhood abuse and abductions.

Lets be honest here, despite what the media wants us to think random abductions are really not worth spending a significant amount of time worrying about. Strangers are not people our children need to have an inherent fear of but friends waiting to happen.

Yes our children need to be taught how to interact safely with others but many parents, in attempting to do so, actually endanger their kids.

Never go in a car with a stranger. 
Seems like sound advice to me but what does a kid hear? When coach Bob asks them to go for a ride they run through their list of memorized rules and decide it is ok since he is not a stranger.
To me a more sensible rule is Never go anywhere with anyone unless you ask me first.

Never take candy from strangers. 
Yeah we force them to break this one all the time. Halloween, Christmas, the first time they meet great aunt Bessie

Don't talk to strangers 
wait a few hours and the same parent is demanding they say hello to a long lost friend or a co worker who is a stranger to the child.

This is part of the reason why stranger danger doesn't work. The other part is that it also enforces the mindset that the people we know are good people. Reality tells us that our kids are more likely to be harmed by someone they know.

Instead we need to teach our children that it is important never to go anywhere with anyone unless they have our permission.

To never let anyone cross their personal boundaries

And to run to a stranger for help if no one else is available. Odds are they are not a pedophile. In fact odds are most people we meet in life are not pedophiles. 

When my eldest went to Universal Studios he was instructed to look for a woman with kids and ask her for help should he get separated from his Gram. Statistically that is the safest person for them to turn to.

Media fear mongering has parents imagining a shadowy boogeyman in every corner but truth is MOST people don't want to hurt your kid

Instead of constantly telling our children what they need to fear and avoid we need to teach them how to be proactive

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Forget the Klondike bar

What would I do for a Klondike bar? Well if I was really desperate I would WALK to the store. In an extreme circumstance I would do so AFTER borrowing money from my kid because I was broke and dying for a Klondike Bar.

More than likely though I would just grab a can of Coke and get over it. I mean really it is a KLONDIKE bar. You wanna hear some really extreme (honest) answers? ask a few mothers of  babies and toddlers what they would do for a nap and the guarantee of waking up to a clean house.

Would you 
* Eat your husbands cooking
* Let the crazy ladies from 'How Clean is your House' into you bathroom
*wrestle an alligator
*Yell "Guns kill people" at a NRA rally
*wear fur to a PETA meeting
*Wear underwear made of duct tape
*let your preschooler pick out clothes and do your makeup for a high school reunion

The answer is a resounding HELL YES! 

Whatever a supposedly sane person would do for a Klondike Bar I'll double it for a nap!, and triple it for a nap coupled with a clean house!

We don't even discuss what I would do for self washing laundry .....

Thursday, April 5, 2012

You are why we don't own nice things!

Seriously there is no point in owning nice things if you have a toddler!

In fact there is no point in owning anything, they will ruin it.  We got a car last week. It isn't new but it is new to us. I have to get a key copied for it tomorrow ... if I find the original,

Of course it only came with one key, and of course my key peg had to fall off the wall and of course my toddler found the key .... and now I can't

I asked him where the key was. I bribed him, and eventually he went and got the keys. The plastic lightning McQueen keys.

I have spent most of my day cleaning. His room is SPOTLESS! I even checked inside his hand puppets.

I can't find them.

I dug through my trash. I have a kid in diapers. there was no key, there was a lot of diapers though and some oatmeal.

I have checked every nook and cranny I can find

I found my cordless phone we lost months ago .

I found some poker chips to hubbys set

I found my oldest child's favorite D20

I never found the keys

I found a cat turd

I lost my sanity

I hope the zombies come soon, preferably before my husband comes home and I have to explain how I lost his car keys. I still have MY van keys but not the keys to his car

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Hairy BFFs

Perhaps I spend too much time on the internet but there seems to be a growing segment of the population who thinks pets are bad for children. They will go ON AND ON about how you should never leave a kid alone with a pet. Especially a dog.

Well I don't know about other parents but for me that would mean I can't HAVE a pet because I need to do things like pee and hang out laundry.

Yes there is a chance of a pet hurting your child. There is also a chance of your child falling off a swing,  breaking their leg in a gopher hole, or chocking to death on a piece of popcorn. If a pet is properly trained and socialized it lowers the risk to a level that I am definitely comfortable with.

Pets have enriched my children's lives . It teaches them to be considerate of the needs of others. It teaches them to treat all living things with kindness. It teaches them how to deal with loss when a pet dies. Most importantly it teaches them responsibility and unconditional love.

As great as all that is though the real reason I wanted my boys to have pets is for the joy animals bring to their lives. When my eldest is fighting with his best friend having Mew2 of Clifford (our cats) curl up with him always puts a smile on his face.

 As for the baby, his best friend in the world has four legs and smells bad when he is wet. Carnage is never too busy cleaning the bathroom or cooking supper to snuggle up or (like in this picture) take a 45 min nap with him.

Animals were an important part of growing up for me.  We always had pets. I missed watching me eldest bond with animals as a toddler because of where we lived but even then we had fish.

I think caring for animals makes us better people. It instills empathy in us at an early age. While it is not always possible to have a pet I think every child that can should